The Journey

First of all I would like to thank you for coming to this site; you are such a blessing to this world. I love your desire to live a life of peace.  A Peaceful Mind is truly heaven on earth.  I’ll tell you my story; one of abuse, betrayal, surrender and finally peace…

For as long as I can remember, I was always searching for something to take away my pain and suffering; Always looking for the latest guru, system, belief or magic that would allow me to finally rest and have A Peaceful Mind. The pain and suffering that I experienced was so unbearable that I tried anything to alleviate it. I felt unworthy and had spent years trying to get to the root of the “issue” so I could move on and actually enjoy my life.  As I got older the pain increased and the unsettled feeling built to be so huge it was unbearable.  I didn’t like myself and I didn’t like many others either.  I was alone, isolated and lost.

As I look back now, it’s easy to see how I tried to mask the pain. In my teens it was with rebellion and extreme ambition. In my 20’s it was by overworking and self-medicating. My thirties were spent searching; hopping from religion to religion, belief to belief trying anything to escape the suffering and pain I was in. The victim role was dramatically played out in every area of my life and in every relationship. My dramatic survivor story became my mantra, “whoa is me, I was abused sexually, physically, no one loves me, no one cares….” I even found myself wearing my survivor badge proudly carrying the belief that you had to suffer in life…so suffer I did.  By my forties I was exhausted, that story had consumed me!

“The risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than
the risk it took to blossom”-Anais Nin

I came to a point where I could not do it any longer. I had to have relief. So one day I found surrendering to the pain. I didn’t care any longer…I was done, I didn’t; care if it consumed me or not.  I didn’t care if I lived another day, I just needed relief! I had no idea what was to come all I knew was that I was tired from running from it. I was ready to face it once and for all.  Living the way I had for the past 40 years was no longer an option for me.  I was done!

“For people who have tried everything and nothing else works,
The last place to look is inside."-Byron Katie

Within 2 weeks of this surrender, Katie’s book, Loving What Is, gracefully fell into my hands. The concept that it could be my belief in thoughts was the cause of my suffering was so refreshing and gave me some hope.  For the first time I could see there may be a light at the end of the tunnel. Katie says, “We don’t have to make decisions, decisions make us”. And that was exactly what happened. Within 2 weeks from buying the book, I was off to the 10 day school for The Work in Los Angeles. I found myself immersed in the work. Even thought the work was scary at times because I was venturing into places that I had never been, everyday the pain and suffering started lifting. Joy was being found in so many unsuspecting places. I could breathe more freely, I had hope for a future, I had faith, inspiration and a peaceful new outlook on life.

Nothing physically had changed in my life except my inquiring into my thoughts; I had the same husband, the same kids, the same house, same car, on and on. Yet everything was so different. People that used to annoy me became beautiful and funny. Problems that were huge in my mind became so ridiculously small, fears that were present my entire left were no longer to be found. For the first time in my life, I truly had A Peaceful Mind!

The grace that I have had has inspired me to share it with others. I am now armed with a tool that I know I can use anytime I suffer. A Peaceful Mind comes from knowing that I will never again become a prisoner of my thoughts and if I do, I can do The Work until I am not. There is nothing I can imagine that could happen to me that could imprison me again…nothing. If you are compelled to join me, I would love to share with you what I have found.

Katie says, “I don’t have the answers. I have something better…the questions”.

I know these questions will bring you peace. Many blessings to you because you are a blessing to me!

Suzy Batiz is a facilitator for The Work of Byron Katie, a coaching tool to help individuals and groups achieve clarity in life and work. She is currently working on 2 children’s books, a meditation CD and a book on self-love entitled The Unwounded-Going through the Pain, Beyond the Scars and Into the Self-Realization of Who You Really Are!